Spoonful Of Self-Awareness Part VII

Spoonful Of Self-Awareness Part VII

Sadly, the heavy infiltration and investment into our lives played a significant role in my family's carbon monoxide accident in Mexico by attempting to manipulate us back into their control by lying about our grandparents' trust fund. Asserting we had to return to Canada and complete paperwork that had already been dealt with several times and there was no other alternative thereby completely jeopardizing our travel plans. We were in the process of putting together Johny's family, upbringing, and starting a retreat venture to bridge the gap between Johny and my bicoastal purposes, as we had been heavily guided in doing so. I believe my father wanted my mother and me back under his control and "in our place."

This meant never recognizing the talent, intelligence, beauty, and willingness we possess and how jealous he is of us. Alike attracts alike, and he used fake energy and that's what he was met with. We were far from fake, exhibiting very real raw emotions he could not comprehend or handle. Like many others, he rejected and demeaned our true emotions and fell prey to manipulating, sneaky fake energy, instead of caring for what is right, true, and aligned. My eldest brother was the first to question the long and drawn out four-year process in which no lawyers were involved and the father-aunt pair attempted to get what they wanted out of my grandmother's will. It is clear now that their objective is to steal and hoard, concealing their motives. My eldest brother of mine was displaying signs of more serious mental disorders at the time, and this was used to negate the questioning of the actions being taken against the will. Various excuses were given as to why things were taking so long. As a result, we were manipulated into signing away the rights to the land that our grandparents owned and had oil rights to. The amount of land, the amount of money, and the truth about our family history on our father's side have been kept under wraps.

We grew up with our mother as the primary figure and our father very absent with visits every other holiday with extended family. We were not familiar with our father's side of the family. There was, in truth, little interest in him, since that is what he offered to us. I found it particularly difficult to relate to most of them, where technology, video games, and warfare games were my brother's escapism, and these family members supported and encouraged as they too had an interest. The home was devoid of imagination and nature, and as a young girl I felt neglected by this side of the family and that they were strangers. When my business started to show success as a young adult and my name became more widespread as a healer, they began to consider me as an interest keyword. My brothers' mental health imbalances are the direct result of what is happening within our core family and the larger battle between the light and dark forces within. We know this is not a coincidence. Having been raised differently from myself, my brothers had a mother who did everything for them, including thinking for them. When I was a child, my mother always made me clean up after myself, taught me responsibility and respect, and scolded me and disciplined me. Fundamentally, they ruled the house and she believed every lie they told her specifically about me, of which there were many. In contrast, I had strong emotions, I cared, I cared about things, I wanted to learn, I wanted to live, and that energy was what my mother could relate to, that she could work with.

In the MANtality of raising boys to be men, tough and emotionless, the providers, women's feelings are given more importance than men. And as a woman, just as the magnetic principle, we carry more pure water/earth which grounds and allows us to feel more deeply. In their male form, they carry more of the feminine principle which is the air/fire which allows them to see the bigger picture more readily. Therefore, we need to learn how to understand, work with, and balance these main bipolar forces into a dynamic team within us to create self-awareness, and from there we will be able to better understand what is needed to maintain balance amongst the opposing and attracting elements outside of ourselves, and in relationships. Whenever we are in the realm of energy, we are capable of healing it, and all we need to do is to be willing to see/feel it in order for it to shift. An alternative to cutting, numbing, freezing, disconnecting, etc., mutilating parts of the cell, atom, or body, which is very detrimental and lacking in knowledge. As we become aware of the roots, pull out the weeds, nourish the soil, hydrate the water, ignite the fire, and give the seed/intention/air what it needs so that you can feel good, accept, and understand it. The mutation of our physical body, for example, occurs when we don't get to the root of the problem in the air, we just deal with it superficially in the physical earth. Leaving aside all the contributing energies; ideas, thoughts, feelings, and actions that contributed to the development of the physical illness/health issue or the rejection of one's own body part, gender and sexuality. We must be willing to examine this more closely.

Why do so many individuals avoid, or opt for, quick and easy solutions? In order to avoid taking responsibility, to avoid seeing the ugly, to avoid trauma, these are all manifestations of avoiding our truth plus our emotions^^^ the subtler feelings. This is what 99% of our family members are currently doing. As for the 1% of my mother who left us too stranded in a psychotic state, she was trapped in lies from her parents, siblings, and my father, thereby locking her in a false reality. Upon reflection, she realizes that this was only possible because she was running and avoiding. At this point, she had experienced some healing, however, as we neared the heavier traumas, she began to get heavily triggered and her persona would shift drastically in which the ice queen would emerge. Considering what she experienced was vile, it makes sense that the traumatized child would keep running from facing her past, her decisions in full, and facing the things that brought her shame and embarrassment, things she wanted to avoid dealing with. As her mother had done, she too continued in that tradition. As my mother begged for the truth, my grandmother took it to her grave. Holding on to someone's truth, story, or actual experiences is like suffocating and killing them. In the absence of AIR, a cell cannot charge or heal. The proper air must be present in order to create the appropriate fire, water, and earth. In essence, it is a chain reaction. If you leave out facts in order to manipulate a story, experience, or someone, you are distorting energy and skewing elements. If all intentions, thoughts, feelings, and actions are not disclosed, there are some missing factors. This results in a serious imbalance.

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Spoonful Of Self-Awareness Part VI

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Spoonful Of Self-Awareness Part VI

Red flags were raised! Since my business started to gain traction, I have dealt with a few women and men similar to this. She, like the others, desired my business, my clientele, my connections, and she sought to manage me. In the end, she wanted me to use my gifts to cheat and lie through energy to make her quick money. Hence, the horse and pony medium show. As we refused to channel for her lottery ticket numbers, she essentially would say "use your power to manipulate and cheat.". Become the medium who *appears to have all of the answers but who does not even understand their own connection, as opposed to teaching others how to manage their energy and how to intuitively connect, using their own power. What a stupid little girl I was for helping honestly and not taking advantage of others. Essentially, she claimed I had a strong dislike and a fear of money, and that if I continued to tell people about my health journey I was making myself sick...that it was not her cancerous intentions or actions that continued to affect everyone as an insidious virus would. There was always a new hair brain scheme to make quick money, and when we would nicely explain how energy works, she would claim that I didn't like her, did not care about her ideas, and after that, the sob drama mama story would begin.

My genuineness and concern for what's right and wrong, what's balanced, have been repeatedly discredited. A number of individuals have attempted to manage me over the years. We are familiar with the manager versus talent dilemma, which is very prevalent in our society. The individuals who are not willing to create or stretch themselves beyond their comfort zones find the talent who becomes their host, the individual who is willing to grow, expand, and put their feet on the line to convince the individuals that they cannot do it on their own and worse yet, they need them. This implies that they are not capable of self-sufficiency and provision and are not whole. Talented individuals must manage themselves, while managers must develop their own abilities. The conclusion becomes whole, and there is no need for anyone or anything else. Everything you need is available to you to fully and successfully manage and achieve your goals. There are those with a higher magnetic field, and there are those with a higher electric field. This is the light versus the dark within. Through the understanding of our relationships and human nature, we can consciously choose to expand, evolve, and balance our individual beings.

As she continued to enforce her plans and play everyone like a fiddle as well as hoard her dark secrets Johny began to see things more clearly and it became evident even to him how he had suffered for years from her lies and betrayal. Under her care, so many aspects of him were affected by traumas and he fell victim to her con artist, controlling, and criminal mentality. There is no judgement in this, rather this is a deeper understanding of her actions, which are a result of her unresolved traumas. Johnny's desire to break unhealthy chains and patterns was met by her unwillingness to see or admit the truth. As a result of her own upbringing and parental displeasure, she lived in a fantasy-filled movie-like world she created for herself. It would have been possible to prevent so much drama and new trauma if the ego had been able to humbly forgive itself, as that is what is required. We understood that we needed to take great responsibility as well as dive deeper into the past to become aware of what energies are contributing from past generations, family patterns, and soul's experiences that were manifesting contrary to what Johny and I intended and wanted.

As the basis of our contracts and connection to others remains at the four fronts, we know that every individual we encounter has been brought to our attention intentionally, and it is our responsibility to connect to our senses and ask for additional information regarding why this individual and what he or she is contributing to our lives? There should be no assuming, expecting, avoiding, disregarding, or coincidences in energy, in reality. Why is this happening four* me? Instead of separating from the collective, the cell-centred approach, why is this happening to me? In this way we are able to move from a two-dimensional reality, in which only two elements are present, to a four-dimensional reality, in which all four elements are available, allowing us to learn from ourselves, to grasp the bigger picture happening, and to connect with all variations of the 8 billion collective consciousness. To achieve this, we need to raise our own vibration. As an example, imagine you are entering an elevator in the morning. You can choose what floor you want to exit and create on. In order to make the best decisions for oneself and others, one must be aware of what is on each level.

How to Human:
On the first floor, there is the earth, one dimension
that is primarily physical and superficial

on the second floor, you have the earth and water, two dimensions
both physical and emotional

on the third floor, you have earth, water, and fire, three dimensions
including physical, emotional, and mental

on the fourth floor, you have earth, fire, water, and air, four dimensions
including physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual

On the fifth level, you have earth, fire, water, and air linked together into Aether, the fifth dimension

In the sixth dimension we have earth, fire, water, air, aether, and light
which is your connection to your higher self

In the seventh dimension, you will find earth, fire, water, air, aether, light, and space.
Creating as one's higher self

The 7 dimensions contribute to the creation of our chakras, our hues, and of our expanding cells into each element, or matter. Upon conception, we begin the process of expanding the cell by utilizing information, also known as energy, which is inherited, transmitted and received by the vessel that carries YOU and the chromosomes that made you. As we gain a deeper understanding of each layer of our being, we can better determine how our systems function and how our human nature operates. Johny and I missed many checkpoints during our journeys because we strayed so far from who we really were. We were raised with limited views of ourselves, this human experience, our families, and with false information. If you do not have the truth, your cell will take on imbalanced air, which manifests in false thoughts, fake feelings, and therefore imbalanced physical actions and a dysfunctional organism. There is a severe disconnect between our actual spirit, source, universal truth, purpose, physicality, as well as what some call the "imposter syndrome". If you do not learn about your CELLS and get in alignment with your purity, essence, and cellular makeup, you will not feel like yourself, or whole, content, or complete.

The level of rejection our race experiences as it attempts to become aware of its own identity is frankly ridiculous. A lack of care, a lack of desire, and a lack of passion have been suffocated out of the system, which has been fed dimmed, skewed, imbalanced forms of the elements since birth. The food, environment, beverages, education, medication, and what your parents/guardians do/say are all factors that influence your health. If our cells do not have a clear sense of what is right and wrong in terms of energy or if their emotional and mental state is far from balanced and real, they can become quite harmful.

Continued